Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Faltering and Restoring

There are times when my confidence falters. Especially where writing is concern. I start to second-guess myself, wondering why I slave on a story that will go no where and no one to read.

I never seen myself as much of an author or story-teller, like the ones I read and enjoy.

Yes, there are acquiantances and few friends who think I'm the greatest writer, but sometimes you just get the feeling all that is false praise to keep from hurting your feelings.

I try not to pester others about my story or insist that they read it. The option is always theirs. Why only a few have read it because they asked.

There is only one place I tend to post all my rough drafts and writings. It's a yahoo group called The Modern Day Bards, and of late, I am the only person who posts. If they read my ramblings I don't know...

But I also send another draft to another friend; she had voiced an interest, and the way I figured, if she did not want to read it, there is always the handy delete button. It's her option and I will not hound by asking "Did you read it."

She's also very finicky about grammar and punctuation. So if i fuck up somewhere I know that she would point it out. Plus she's an avid reader, and so she would know if the story or scene flows.

So it was up-lifting, when doubt began to creep into my conscious, I wonder why I was even trying to write everyday, that my words were crap, the story was pointless and basically dumb... and you don't say a word about this to anyone, so then out-of-the-blue, a friend tells you..

"Oh yeah I had question about that latest piece you sent me." Which makes you shocked to know THEY did read it. Then "You're doing great. The story is coming along nicely, it flows. Keep up the good work."

Just does wonders to restore a flagging confidence.